My husband travels a lot for work.  Like a lot lot lot.  And not locally.  He flies all over the country to visit clients.  I consider him a professional airplane traveler.  He gets to go through the faster line at airport security.  He knows all the restaurants and ATM's in the concourses.  And he could tell you which airports and airlines stink.  He knows how to travel efficiently and without drama.

I do not travel a lot for work.  Being more or less a stay-at-home mom, I only fly once or twice a year.  After recently flying to Key West for the weekend, I realized my husband is a much better traveler than me.  I tried to be all Zen and calm and chill during the airplane/airport experience but I gotta tell you, it was hard.  I'm not afraid to fly.  In fact, I kind of like it.  I love getting someplace far away fast.  It's all the other stuff (read: people) that really turn my crank.  Don't get me wrong.  I am a people person.  I just don't think I'm an airplane people person.  

We had no problems getting to Florida and had a lovely weekend there.  It was the trip home from Key West that inspired this blog.  It took almost 24 hours to get from Florida to my home in Md.  I could have driven a car faster.  We had some sort of mechanical issue that resulted in us sitting on the tarmac for 2 1/2 hours in Key West ( I SWEAR it was 140 degrees in the plane.  Greg says no way.), thus missing our connection in Orlando.  OF COURSE, there were no available seats to get us home that night so we got stuck at the Hyatt in Orlando.  Yes, there are worse places to be stuck.  But when you want to go home and you're all out of clean underwear, you just want to go home.  Did you know Orlando airport doesn't sell underwear?  They "aren't allowed".  What the what?!!?

So here are a list of tips for all you travelers out there that need reminders how to act when you are on an airplane.  Pay attention.

I’ve been sick for 3 ½ weeks.  Fer reals.  I’ve never been sick for this long.  I’m not looking for sympathy (ok maybe a little), just venting.  Here’s how all this craziness started.

Seems like it’s been about 2 months or so ago that Claire got sick.   Sick is defined as a never, ever ending cough (hack, hack, hack) that I told her I was SURE was Fall allergies.  She got little sympathy from me,  a bunch of cough drops, and some allergy medicine.   After about 2 weeks of nonstop hacking I figured a trip to the doctor may be in order.  It was either that or the loony bin for me.  You can only take so much of your kid coughing.  (Especially at night when you’re trying to sleep and you keep hearing your kid hacking.)

We went to Patient First to see what was up.

Druuummmmmm rollllllll.   Here's some funny stuff from Pinterest that I found this week. Let me know which one is your favorite!!

Rrrawwwwrrrrr

Trick or Treat!

 Cheers! 

Let's lighten things up  and have Funny Friday!  (Yes I changed the name from Friday Funnies.  Keeping it fresh!)  Here's the best pins from Pinterest for the week.  Tell me your favorite.... 

What was she thinking?   

 Poking on Facebook is stewpid.  Don't even think about poking me.

 Well now we know where Waldo is.

In the interest of protecting the privacy of kids who are having anxiety, I’m intentionally vague about the “who” for this blog post.  I considered not writing about it, but felt that this is important stuff for all parents and families to know about worries. 

If you read my post yesterday about 11 Parenting Do’s, you know that there are all kinds of stuff I think you should do as a parent to raise strong, healthy children.  For today’s post, I want you to throw all that out the window.  Having family member or knowing a kid with anxiety will put all those skills to the test.  Worse yet, half of those things won’t work when someone you love is having full-on anxiety issues.

Here’s what I think you need to know about a kid with major anxiety:

Originally this post was about Miley Cyrus.   Then I decided that many of you (myself included) were tired of hearing about her and really don’t care about her (myself NOT included).  I do care about Miley in a weird way.  I feel sad for her.  Does Miley know or care that I feel sad for her?  Nope.  But I still do.  I could call her a tramp or disgusting or any of the gazillion other things that have been printed about her.  But I won’t.  Because she is lost.  Very very lost.  She needs compassion.   And she needs guidance. She needs someone to help her find her way.  I suggest Jesus.  And no, I’m not kidding. 

So after I wrote this whole long thing about Miley and how we shouldn’t NOT parent our kids so they turn out like her, I realized I really didn’t want to attack her or use her as an example of what not to do.  (Yes I realize this is a horrendous sentence, but you get my point.)  What I really want to do is give you my Top 11 list of  Parenting DO’s that I try to follow. 

Some of you will read this and say “this is about ME”.  It’s NOT.  This is about ME and what I work for parenting my kids.  To be honest with you, my parenting skills are really lacking at times.  Like, I’m really not good at it.  But I desire to be a good parent and this is stuff I’ve picked up along the way.  Some of this from social worker training, some is common sense, and much is from making many mistakes along the way.

Here you go:

Do you realize it's been a MONTH since I've posted anything?  And my last post wasn't a real post, 'cause it's just basically regurgitated Pinterest funny stuff.  Too be honest with you, it felt like longer than a month since I posted.  I feel like I haven't written in forever.

Why?

Well, I don't really know, to be perfectly honest.  Ok, I sort of know.  But only a little.

School started.  Many of us jump for joy when the kidlets return to school and there's a little more time to do cooking, cleaning, and other activities alone.  Being honest, I will tell you that I would fall into that category.  Those last two weeks of summer, before school starts, aren't exactly a study in harmony and kumbaya.  They are torture weeks where the kids pick, pick, pick and fight, fight, fight until you yell UNCLE, UNCLE, UNCLE!!!  

Then they return to school.  And the first day is great.  You're productive and peaceful and feeling fly.  No fights to break up.  No one to pick up after.  Zeennnnnnn.

But then that first week goes by and you start to feel a little lonely.  Yeah, you have plenty to do but it's so weird without your offspring there.  Parenting adds FLAVOR to your day.  

So that's the first part of why this blogger hasn't been blogging.  I had a little "identity crisis"?  What am I supposed to be doing with my life?  Rather than write about my feelings I avoided my feelings and chose to be all private and quiet about my thoughts.  Weird right?

Happy Friday On My Own Nerves readers!  Thanks for stopping by to see this week's funny pins from Pinterest.  Check 'em out and tell me which one is your favorite.....

 I wonder if this comes in pink?

The only thing beets are good for.  Yuck.

This is me, several times per week.  

Ever heard of Candy Crush?  Seriously.  Who hasn't heard of the game where you pulverize candies?  Anyone?  Anyone?  Are you playing it?  Played it?  Never going to?

I actually heard about Candy Crush (CC from now on) a while ago.  I even played it a while back but didn't get hooked.  You see, I played (play) this other game called Bejeweled Blitz (we can call it BB from now on, if you want.) that I thought was better than CC because it's fast and fun and all that.  I tried CC and felt like it was too slow and didn't crush fast enough and I didn't get why people would choose CC over BB.  And so I didn't play it anymore and took it off my phone.  I sniffed that BB was better than CC and CCers were dumb not to realize that BB is the better game.  Got that?

Let me back up a sec.  For those of you scratching your noggins saying "what in holy heck is she talking about?",  here is a brief explanation.  Both CC and BB are games you can play on your phone or online.  You match of rows of candy or jewels to make special candies or jewels and try to smash the heck out of everything to get a high score and/or pass on to  the next level.  Just writing what the game is makes me feel crazy.  It sounds as kooky as it is. You can check out both these games on Facebook or Google Play Store or the Apple Store or just Google them and you'll find them.  

Ok, so let's flash forward to last month.  I went on vacation with my family.  My niece, Madelyn, was playing CC and encouraged me to try it again.  I sat with her and asked "Why is this better than BB?  Why is this fun?  I don't get it."  She patiently held my hand (Not really. She's 12 and too cool to hold my hand.) and explained about the levels and the goal to beat the levels and how you try to get candy combos etc, etc, etc.  Ohhhhhhhhhhh.  The goal isn't supposed to be fast (unless that's the goal of the level).  It's to do what the level tells you to do.  I'm sure you understand what I just said if you're a CCer.  If you're not, please bear with me.

Good Morning.  (Or afternoon or evening or middle-of-the-night, depending on the time of day you're reading this.)  It's my favorite time of day.  I've probably been awake since 5:30 or 6, vaguely wishing I could go back to sleep because it's so early.  But I know I won't/can't.  I haul myself out of bed to head downstairs to the best part of the day.  Yes, I've written about morning before.  You can read about it HERE

I can't remember how long it's been since I was a morning person.  I'm thinking it coincides with the birth of my children.  I know I used to "sleep in" and couldn't imagine rolling out of bed before dawn.  Since the little turkeys have come along, my sleep has forever changed. I'm sure most parents can relate to this, unless you're lucky enough to have a child who sleeps a lot.  I was not one of the lucky ones.  After a number of years of kids getting up early, I think I just finally gave in and became a morning person.  For the record, I also stay up until about 11.  I'm the last one to bed and the first one up.  Thus, my need for naps.  

Now my kids sleep in.  Mostly.  There are occasional days when a little person rolls out of bed before they're supposed to and comes down to break the silence of the morning.  Of course now that school is in session this happens Monday through Friday.  It throws off my morning mojo a bit, but it's not so bad.

Most of us fall into being morning people or night owls.  Some of you, weirdly, are afternoon people.  Whatever works for you.  For the afternoon and night people, the following list probably won't make a whole lot of sense to you because it's not your time of day.  I'd love to see your list of "why nighttime all day is a great idea".

Back to mornings.  Here's why my day would be great if morning was all day:

I got lots of messages that you missed Friday Funnies last week.   Well, Pinterest was being a jerk and pins weren't working and stuff.  But no worries.  I have some hilarious pins for you this week.  Enjoy!

 Who doesn't love a good puffin?

 Impressive collection of burned out signs.

Best maternity shirt ever?

I've been having trouble blogging because:

A. I'm lazy

B. My kids have been home all summer.

C. I've been crushing candy.

D. All of the above.

If you picked D, you're a winner!  Holy moly do I have focus issues.  But you just wait.  The kidlets return to school on Monday and imma rock this blog!  Holla!

Today, I was reflecting on my new spiritual journey and all the great things that have been happening.  I'm super happy and feel like life has gotten so much better.  Not that life was bad before.  But now it has whole new meaning, purpose, and joy.   I still feel shy about sharing a lot.  There's a couple of reasons for this:

• I fear I'll turn you off.  A few months ago, if YOU had talked to me or shared with me any of this, I would have tuned you out.  I would have been defensive and annoyed.  Truly.  I KNOW there will be those of you who will feel exactly this.  But I hope most of you won't.
• Claire has expressed how much of a "dork" she thinks I am, to have found this new path. Usually this is related to me listen to The Message on XM radio.  I'm being patient with her, praying that she realizes the importance of it all.  I'm quite sure I'll be placed in a "dork" category with some folks.  That's ok.  I'm gonna keep on jammin' to The Message.  
• I still don't feel confident explaining all the truths I'm learning.  I learned a lot in Sunday School as a child, but forgot so much.  And let's face it. There's SO MUCH to learn.  It's never ending.  I would like to have intelligent conversations with people though, so I'll keep learning.

As I've immersed myself in this whole new way of life, I've read/watched/listened to many resources that have taught me so much in a short amount of time.  I thought I'd share what I've been tuning into.  

Since I've partially recovered from our beach vacation this past week, I thought I'd write a post about our road trip to vacation.  Everyone should learn how to properly go on a road trip as a family.  Just the two of you?  Doesn't count.  You have to have at least 2 children to be able to relate to our excellent adventures.  

All road trips should start in the middle of the night.  There's something magical about awakening at 3:30 in the morning to make sure you're on the road by 4.  By magical, I mean insane.  Hopefully, your newly found insane self is able to drive legally, in between the white and yellow lines.  Coffee (caffiene) helps with this, but not too much, 'cause then you'll have to go to the bathroom.  More on that later.  

Be sure to pack your car very, very, very full.  So full that you have to put the cooler in the back seat between your two children.  Of course, they have plenty of room to breath, but not enough to do gymnastics.  At approximately 4:01am (1 minute after pulling out of the driveway), allow the children to have a cooler fight by pushing it back and forth between each other, attempting to smash each other.  This will be their attempt at gaining more space for themselves.  This will obviously not be successful and will tick your insane self off enormously.

Deep breath.  You can do this.

Hi guys!!!  How ARE you?!  I'm sure you've been worried about me, not posting and all. There's a good reason.  I was on vacation!   I just got back from the Outer Banks of North Carolina, where I had a sun(burned) and fun (crazy) filled week.  I'm still recovering. And doing laundry.  Lots of laundry.  

I didn't tell you guys or any of my millions of social media friends that I was gone 'cause I know you would have wanted to come over here and party and take all my food.  Just kidding.  I didn't leave any food.  I just did the safety-conscious thing and didn't tell anyone of my whereabouts.  I hope you missed me.  I missed you!

I know you're worried I'm gonna post 600 pictures of my trip.  Don't worry!  I didn't take that many.  You can look forward to a few photos later this week...but I promise they won't be your "typical" vacation pics.

One day before we left for vacation, I was packing (enough clothes for a month away), I noticed that my Jenna was playing quietly.  Jenna is never quiet, so I had to investigate. Here's a picture of what I found.

So many funny pins I liked this week.  Enjoy!

Truth

 Impressive

 I really need to get better at Photoshop.  Awesome.

In case you don't feel like reading the book.